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Word of the Week – Exasperated

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Each Friday, I would like to share a word of the week with you. Something that summarises what I’ve been up to, how I’ve felt and how life is generally going. I’d love if you’d share your own in the comments or even join in with the link up if you are a blogger. (You can find the details at the bottom of this post.) It can be so therapeutic to reflect on what’s been happening, good or bad. It will be nice to look back on these posts in the future too!

 

This week I have chosen the word Exasperated

Unfortunately my word for this week is not a positive one. The strain of lockdown is finally getting to me and I just feel exasperated this week. For three whole months I felt OK about having to stay at home and away from my family. Yes it has been incredibly difficult, but it has kept us all safe. For that alone the pain has been worth it.

Then, within just a few days, several friends announced to me that they had been breaking the rules. They explained that the pandemic has been incredibly difficult on their mental health and so they just decided to break the rules because it helped them to feel better. All of these friends are of course healthy and have the option to do relatively normal things like go to the shops. I just can’t help but get angry.

As I’m pregnant, I’m considered moderate risk. My parents are high risk, as is my Grandma who is staying with them. Members of Mike’s family are also very high risk and we potentially won’t be able to see them (other than from a distance) until a vaccine is made available.

I understand that we all have our own challenges. This is a blooming difficult time for everyone. I just can’t help but feel like so many people are walking around with blinkers on. Instead of considering the impact their actions might have on others who are more at risk of becoming very ill, their own needs are taking priority.

I’m so sorry to go on such a negative rant. I realise that we’re all doing our best to be positive. Sometimes life pushes your limits though, and I really appreciate having the space to express how I feel.

To help myself feel better I’m doing a few things. Firstly, I’m stepping back from social media. Avoiding the “I’ve only been to the garden centre ten times this week and I feel sad” posts can only be a good thing for me. I counted and I’ve been out the house 5 times since the middle of March. Three of those were to the doctor’s / hospital. Yes, I’m wild.

More importantly, Mike and I have agreed to be selfish and just focus on family. Checking in to make sure everyone is OK and making the occasional garden plans with his side of the family are all that we will concern ourselves with. That, and each other of course. We have a wonderful little bundle arriving in November and that should really be at the centre of our world right now!

Emma x

 

You can read my last word of the week post here.

 Follow this button to join in with the weekly Word of the Week Linky with Raisie Bay

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10 Comments

  1. It must be so hard being stuck inside when everyone else seems to be making up their own rules. My sister is pregnant too and she’s also going stir crazy. It will be worth it when your beautiful baby is born! Exasperated is a brilliant word, by the way! #wotw

    1. Sunshine and Rain says:

      It is but then I’m so pleased for everyone who can begin to see their families again too! My emotions are all over the place! 😛 I’m so excited for November, life will be very different then! #wotw

  2. It’s hard isn’t it. I see people gathering and shopping on the television and miss having a life being stuck home for so long. Myself and two of my children are highly vulnerable so we have been nowhere until this week. I met up with my brother, outside, to give him his birthday cards and presents. It was so weird going out. But we socially distanced and met no-one else. But even my own family have been flouting the rules. My niece has been posting pics of her and her friends in a hot tub, another boasting of a ‘socially distanced garden party’ where they are all hugging for the photo. I’ve refrained from posting. I don’t think any of my family have abided by the rules, so I won’t be seeing them for a long while.
    We can be annoyed and we are allowed to be, but fingers crossed, life will become more normal soon and we can get back to actually ‘living’ again. BTW, I was a November baby 🙂 #wotw

    1. Sunshine and Rain says:

      Oh it must be a good month for them then Anne 😉 Deep breaths and just look away! It’s the only thing that’s helping me at the minute. Turning inwards to my own bubble and ignoring those breaking the rules. It’ll sadly mean that I won’t see them for a long time, but that’s OK. Life goes on! #wotw

  3. Oh no! Sending hugs. Sorry that it hasn’t been a good week and lockdown is getting to you.
    Your friends are silly, silly people breaking the rules. I can understand why you are angry. x

    1. Sunshine and Rain says:

      As long as my family are safe and healthy, that’s what matters. Doing my best to focus on that and it definitely seems to be working 🙂 #wotw

  4. Yes, I get exasperated when friends tell me about breaking the rules too. We are not asked to do much, just stay at home or wear masks and social distance if we go out. Focusing on family is not selfish – it’s thoughtful and wise.

    1. Sunshine and Rain says:

      It’s really helping me Laurie. Pleased to say I am feeling so much better now 🙂 #wotw

  5. I can completely understand you feeling angry at other people breaking the rules, especially given you are more at risk. I think you’re wise taking a step back from social media – I’ve been doing that more too and it’s made me less stressed. Focusing on family is a good thing right now. Take care and stay safe x #WotW

    1. Sunshine and Rain says:

      Thanks Louise, I’m pleased to say I’m definitely feeling better now! Staying away from social media has definitely helped. As long as my family are safe, that’s what matters #wotw

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